Sick
by BluStrawberri
Summary: In which Joshua nurses Neku back to health, confessions are made, and Joshua is Joshua. Strange plot ahoy! JoshuaxNeku


A/N: Hey, all! I know this has been a long time since I've been on here…years, in fact, but I decided that I should pick writing up again. I'm warning you now, this is long and has a slightly weird plot, because I haven't written in a while, and it all just sort of came out all in a rush. And also, my first detailed lemon! I got so embarrassed writing that part, you have no idea. I hope it turned out well. Please excuse my rusty skills.

Warnings: Joshua being an ass, Neku's potty mouth. This story goes to fluff and drama and back to fluff in .06 seconds. Beware of weird plot. Also, lemon!

OoO

"What did you say?!"

"I'm sorry Neku, but I can't come over when you're sick. I have to go to an interview, and I want to be presentable. Our school project will have to wait until you're better."

Neku glared at the phone. Why, of all times, did he have to get sick? He was fine yesterday. Yeah, maybe he shouldn't have gone out in the rain without a coat, but it wasn't even that cold! And Neku never got sick. Even when half his class had the flu, he didn't even sneeze once. This sucked.

"But Shiki," Neku protested, "we haven't even started it yet! It's due in a week!"

"Well, you should have thought about that when you decided to slack off and go to that 777 concert with Beat."

Neku tried again. "But I'm not even that sick! I can manage it!" After the that last part, however, he began to sneeze. Three times in a row. Man, couldn't he ever catch a break?

"I'm sorry, Neku," Shiki took on a softer tone, "but it'll have to wait until next time. I'm sure you'll get better soon!"

A sigh. "All right. You win. But as soon as I'm better, we're going to do the project."

"Of course, Neku," Shiki said. "Now, I have to go. Drink lots of fluids and get some rest!"

"Yes, mother," Neku grumbled.

"What was that?"

"I mean, okay, Shiki. Good luck on the interview!"

"Thanks! Seeya!"

"Yeah, seeya," Neku closed the phone with a _snap_. Now what was he going to do? His parents were gone on a trip, so he was home alone. At least they stocked up the fridge before they left. And he had lots of tissues, so that wouldn't be a problem. He decided to head up to his room to take a nap. He was drained, anyway.

He headed up the stairs, taking them one by one. He didn't want to fall in his current state. Gods know he needed a head injury on top of a cold. That would be just his luck.

As soon as he turned the doorknob, he felt a breeze pass him. Huh. Was his window open? A quick glance said that no, it was shut. Oh, well. Maybe he was imagining things. He walked to his bed, thankful he had stayed in his pajamas. Lifting the covers and laying down, he tried to get comfortable. Just as he was about to fall asleep, he heard an airy giggle.

Neku quickly sat up in his bed. No, it couldn't be. A cursory glance around his room showed nothing out of the ordinary. He breathed a sigh of relief. Maybe he _was_ sick, to be hallucinating weird sounds. He tried to get comfortable again, finding it harder this time. When he closed his eyes, he heard a voice right next to his ear.

"Sick, are we?"

Neku jumped up. Standing in front of him was no other than the Composer himself, Joshua. He was too shocked to speak.

"Hm, speechless? I know it's hard to be around my dazzling looks for long," And with that, Joshua flipped his hair back and giggled.

Neku finally found his voice. "What the hell are _you_ doing here? Don't you have anyone else to pick on?"

Joshua frowned for a second, but quickly smirked. "Why of course, Neku dear. I just figured that since you were sick, I might as well nurse you back to health. Don't want you _dying_ on me."

"What the hell, bastard? That's not funny," Neku growled. "And thanks, but no thanks. I'm doing perfectly fine on my own." Another trio of sneezes. Dammit.

"I can see that," Joshua smirked.

"Shut up," Neku grumbled. Of all people, the Composer knew he was sick. And he wanted to nurse Neku back to health! Neku didn't know what all that would entail, but he had the feeling that it wasn't going to be good for his sanity.

"Oh, come on," Joshua said, "I'm the only one who can help you. I might even be able to use my _godly_ powers to make you better."

Neku considered this. It was probably just some joke to the Composer. Hell, Joshua probably _made_ him sick in the first place! Neku didn't know how that would work, but knowing Joshua, he would find a way. But Joshua _did_ sound like he could help. And it might not even be too bad to have some Composer help.

"…All right," Neku said quietly.

"Hm? I can't hear you, dear. Speak up."

"I said, all right!" Neku said loudly. "But no being a perv. I don't want you coming near me with your grabby hands."

Joshua giggled. "As you wish, Neku dearest."

Neku sighed. He had a bad feeling about this.

OoO

Surprisingly, Joshua was true to his word. He was really helpful. A gentleman, even. Neku couldn't believe it. Joshua treated him to homemade soup in bed (since when did he know how to cook?), picked up his tissues without complaint, and even tucked him in to bed! The last part annoyed Neku a bit, but he figured it could be worse, so he didn't complain. He slept soundly for about two hours, until a soft giggle woke him up.

He opened his eyes to find Joshua sitting next to him in his bed. He tried to move, but found himself trapped in pale arms. He looked into purple eyes. "What the hell are you doing?"

Joshua giggled. "I'm making sure that you sleep."

"By _cuddling_ with me?"

"It certainly helped," Joshua smirked.

Neku admitted that he had a point. But still! "Get off me!"

Joshua hummed. "No can do. I'm afraid that this is the only way to make you better. By being in contact with you, I can send my energy to heal you faster."

Neku had doubts about this, but he was too tired to call Joshua out on it. "Fine, whatever. Just keep your arms _above_ my waist."

"Yes, sir," Joshua giggled.

Neku closed his eyes, but found that sleeping was hard. It didn't help that he was hyper-aware of the Composer next to him. Neku felt every shift that he made. He stopped a moment to consider why the hell he was doing this. After all, Joshua _was_ the one who shot him. He thought back to the past two months.

After the game, and after Joshua had shot him again, Neku had a lot to think about. He felt betrayed, angry, hurt. For the first few weeks after the game, he had hated Joshua with all his might. However, after about a month, he found that he was tired of hating Joshua. He used up so much energy on that hate that it was starting to affect his own life. He kept his friends at a distance. He barely talked to his parents. All of his time was consumed by hating Joshua.

He didn't realize he had pushed everyone away until Shiki said something about it. She had told him that she was worried, that she thought he was falling back into his old pattern of shutting out the world. She said that she missed him. That all of his friends did.

Her words struck home for him. He apologized, and he had told himself that from that day forward, he would stop thinking about the bad things, and start thinking about the good stuff that had happened. Meeting new friends. Gaining a new perspective on life. Even meeting Joshua. Without all of that, he would still be stuck in the same loop, hating the world and hating his life. Everything that happened had changed all that.

In a way, he was thankful to Joshua for everything. Not for shooting him, of course, but for making him see that there was good in the world, and that Neku was missing so much of it by shutting everything out. _The bastard still didn't have to shoot me_, Neku thought.

Joshua moved in his sleep. Neku had to admit to himself that he found Joshua attractive. He had figured this out in the second week, right about when he had started to accept the guy as a friend. If it wasn't for that infuriating giggle, Joshua could almost be cute. Even after the game, he still found himself looking for those purple eyes, that ashy-blond hair. He even saw a few flashes of them, but they were gone as soon as he looked.

Neku turned over, watching Joshua as he slept. After he was better, he would blame his willingness to submit to Joshua's demands as a side effect of his sickness. No one would be the wiser. It would be as it should be, Neku in his human life and the Composer high on his throne. _It wouldn't work_, he told himself. _He isn't even human._ His heart hurt, though, at the thought of letting someone so connected to him, someone that was so much a part of his life, walk away like nothing happened. He settled for watching the Composer as he slept. He looked so innocent, nothing like what he actually was-a manipulative bastard. He heaved a sigh.

And sneezed three times in a row. _Fuck_.

Joshua opened his eyes drowsily, looking much like a child just waking up. Until he smirked. The image was ruined. "Have a nice rest, Neku dearest?"

"Whatever, Joshua. As soon as I'm better, you're gone," Neku grumbled.

"How are you feeling?" Joshua asked, dropping the smirk and eyes softening. Neku didn't know what to make of this. It almost seemed like Joshua…cared.

"I think I'm feeling a lot better," Neku said, and he found that he _did_ feel better. "Whatever magic you did to me seemed to have worked."

"That's good," Joshua smiled, but catching himself, he then smirked. "Couldn't have my proxy dying on me."

"Jesus, Joshua, it was just a cold. That joke's still not funny," Neku growled, disentangling himself from Joshua's arms. He felt cold at the loss of body heat. He could have imagined it, but Joshua frowned for a second before regaining his composure.

"Well, now that you have no need of me, I think I'll be going now," Joshua said airily. He got up from the bed and moved to leave, but Neku's hand shot up and grabbed Joshua's wrist.

"Wait," Neku said. He couldn't believe he was doing this, but that goodbye sounded so…final. He had a feeling that Joshua was going to leave for good. And Neku needed to explain so much. "Why did that goodbye sound like I won't ever see you again?"

Joshua didn't turn around. "Because you won't."

"What the hell? First, you make this big deal about nursing me back to health, and then you just decide to leave like nothing's the matter? What the hell is wrong with you?" Neku glared up at the smaller boy, whose back was still turned away. "Dammit, look at me!"

Joshua turned around, frowning. Neku saw an unreadable expression on his face. "What's wrong with me? I think it's obvious. The living and the dead are never meant to meet. Humans aren't supposed to know about the Composer. They should be going about their lives, blissfully unaware. You are something of an anomaly, Neku. I've betrayed you so many times, and still you come searching for me. Why is that? What could you possibly gain from seeing me again?"

Neku thought about it. "Because you're my partner. Because I trust you. Because maybe I think you're not as much of an asshole as you make yourself out to be."

"What if I really _am_ like that? I can be cruel," Joshua sneered, "I can destroy lives with the flick of my hand. I _have_ destroyed lives. Adults, teenagers, children, it doesn't matter. All play my game to get a second chance at life. Only one gains that chance. Tell me, how is that not cruel?"

"I know you can be a bastard. That part's certain," Neku said. Joshua rolled his eyes. "But I know that deep down, there's something good inside you. Why else would you decide to keep Shibuya the way it is, to not destroy it? Why would you bring me and my friends back to life? I think you care about Shibuya. About us." _About me, _Neku added silently.

"Well, you're wrong. About everything. All of you humans are my pawns, meant to be played and thrown away. I revived your friends because they amuse me. I didn't destroy Shibuya because it is still of use to me. I'm not so caring as you want to believe," Joshua said coldly.

"Oh please, get over yourself!" Neku rolled his eyes. "So you like games. So you're basically a god. But that doesn't mean that your emotions count any less! Jesus, Joshua, can't you see that I care about you?"

It felt good to admit it. To voice it out loud. Neku might have felt embarrassed, but he figured that it was about time he said it. Gods know how long he wanted to.

Joshua looked at him with an unreadable expression. He was silent for a while. When he did speak, it was in a quiet voice. "But it would never work. You're human and I'm not. I'm immortal. When you're in your sixties, I'll be the same as I am today."

"That doesn't matter to me," Neku protested. "All I know is that if you leave now, everything will be left unfinished. You can't leave it like this. Don't you care at all?"

"I _do_ care," Joshua said quietly. Neku's heart skipped a beat. "That's why I'm leaving. You'd be better off without me."

"Dammit, Josh, aren't you even listening to me? I want you! Hell, I _need_ you! Can't you understand?" Neku saw no change in Joshua's expression. His heart hurt at the thought of the Composer leaving. So he did the only thing that came to mind. He kissed him.

The Composer was shocked at first. He was trembling slightly, as if trying to control himself. When he felt that Joshua wasn't kissing back, Neku growled and bit Joshua's lip. Immediately Joshua opened his mouth with a gasp, and Neku took the opportunity to sneak his tongue into Joshua's mouth. Something seemed to snap in the Composer, because suddenly Neku felt himself being pushed onto the bed forcefully, the kiss still unbroken. He felt Joshua's tongue sliding against his own, and he let out a moan. Joshua broke the kiss and looked down at Neku, out of breath and looking so damn gorgeous. Joshua's lips were red and swollen, and Neku lifted a hand to his own lips. He was aware that he was painfully hard, and from the looks of things, so was Joshua.

"Do you really want this?" Joshua asked in a breathy whisper. Neku knew that he was talking about more than just their actions.

"Yes," he whispered, afraid that if he spoke any louder, it would break the spell they were under. He looked into the Composer's eyes. Purple orbs reflected back, for once not masked. He saw a soft look, one of love and affection. Neku smiled. "Yes, I do."

"Okay, then," Joshua said, and rolled his hips. Neku felt the delicious friction between their clothed dicks, and he moaned. Joshua's hands slipped beneath his shirt, sending tingles wherever they touched. Neku felt hot all over as the Composer's hands roamed his body.

Neku felt his shirt being lifted, so he raised his arms above his head. The garment slid off easily, and Neku shivered at the cold air. Joshua brushed his lips on Neku's briefly before licking a trail down to the younger man's neck. Neku hissed as he felt a sharp pain when the silverette bit down on the junction of his neck, and the Composer kissed the spot almost apologetically before moving down to his chest. Neku gasped as Joshua took a pert nipple into his mouth, rolling the nub between his tongue and teeth gently. It wasn't long before the Composer was going lower, swirling his tongue in Neku's navel briefly as he kissed down to the trail of hair leading down to Neku's still-clothed cock.

"Are you sure?" Joshua asked again, looking up into Neku's eyes. "Because from this moment on, there's no going back."

"Just do it, dammit!" Neku growled impatiently, his lower half throbbing.

"Yessir," Joshua chuckled, and slowly began unzipping Neku's pants. He slid them off along with Neku's boxers with ease. Joshua leaned back, raking his eyes appreciatively over the man below him. Neku blushed, feeling the heat of those eyes, and covered his face, embarrassed.

Joshua pulled his arms away. "There's nothing to be embarrassed about, Neku dear. I want your pretty little eyes to see everything I'm going to do to you."

Neku's cock jumped in anticipation at his words. The silverette smiled predatorily as he leaned down and licked the head of Neku's cock before taking the shaft fully into his mouth. Heat surrounded his member, and Neku moaned. Taking this as a sign of encouragement, Joshua started licking the base of his cock slowly, as if savoring the taste of it. Neku let out a loud, breathy moan, his eyes transfixed on the scene. Damn, did Joshua look gorgeous like that, his head bobbing up and down as he sucked Neku off. "Harder," he whispered harshly.

Joshua didn't reply, only increasing his pace. Neku ran his hands through the ashy-blonde hair, head thrown back in ecstasy. He felt pressure building up inside of him quickly, and he gave a tug on Joshua's hair to warn him. "J-Josh!"

Joshua gave a big suck, and Neku groaned as he felt himself cumming into the Composer's mouth. When the waves of pleasure died down, he cautiously looked down at the silverette. Joshua was smirking, licking the traces of cum off of his lips. Oh gods, he swallowed it? Neku blushed.

As if sensing his thoughts, Joshua smiled and leaned up to kiss Neku. Neku could taste his own essence on his tongue, and he was embarrassed to admit that it turned him on. Then Joshua broke the kiss and chuckled. "Really now, embarrassed over that? You tasted delicious." He grinned. "Although I think it's about time for my clothes to come off now, dear."

Neku noticed for the first time that he was the only one who was naked. He chuckled nervously. Oops. Joshua started to remove his own clothes, but Neku stopped him. "Wait, let me do it."

"As you wish," Joshua smirked.

It was surprisingly hard, given his current state. Neku's hands trembled as he unbuttoned Joshua's shirt. He pushed the garment off of the smaller man's shoulders, and started unzipping Joshua's pants. Hands shaking, he slowly pulled them off, grabbing the boxers and pulling them down as well. Neku took in the sight.

Joshua was beautiful. Face flushed, hair sticking out in every direction. His pale skin seemed to glow, unmarred by any scars or imperfections. Neku's eyes trailed downwards to Joshua's cock. His own member stirred to life at the sight of it.

He felt Joshua's smirk, even if he didn't see it. "Like what you see, dear?"

"Yes," he answered honestly, finding words coming out of his mouth more easily now. Joshua smiled. "Now hurry up and fuck me."

Joshua laughed, a pleasant ringing sound that buzzed in Neku's ears. Neku thought that he really should get Joshua to do that more. "As you wish."

Joshua crawled up to Neku on the bed, straddling him. He rubbed his naked cock on Neku's member, and they both groaned at the delicious feeling of flesh against flesh. Neku marveled at how good it felt.

Joshua lifted his hand and brought it near Neku's mouth. "Suck."

Neku obeyed, taking the digits in his mouth and swirling his tongue around them. Through his half-lidded eyes, he saw Joshua's heated gaze, and his cock twitched. When they were wet enough, Joshua removed his hand and reached down below, where Neku couldn't see. His hand disappeared, and Neku didn't have time to think as he felt a sharp pain in his backside. He hissed.

"Is that okay?" Joshua murmured breathily. Neku nodded, becoming used to the sensation.

Then another finger was added. Neku hissed slightly as the two digits began moving around, stretching him out as they moved. A third digit entered, though the pain was somewhat lessened. When Neku felt that he was ready, he looked into Joshua's questioning eyes and nodded.

Bracing himself, Neku held his breath as he felt Joshua's cock enter him slowly. He breathed in sharply, squeezing his eyes shut at the burning pain. Gods, it hurt. Nothing could have prepared him for this. He was shocked to feel himself tearing up.

"Are you all right?" Joshua asked in a concerned voice.

"Yeah, just give me a minute," Neku murmured. He waited until he could no longer feel the burning pain of having something inside him, stretching him out. When he felt it was all right, he shifted experimentally, testing out this new feeling. Both men groaned as Neku rolled his hips.

"Gods, Neku," Joshua breathed. "You're so tight."

"It's because I'm a virgin, jackass," Neku couldn't help but retort. "Now move."

Joshua laughed. "Yes, dear." And then he started to thrust.

Neku groaned. It felt painful at first, but gradually felt better and better until he was moaning with pleasure underneath Joshua. Every thrust made him feel like he was flying, and the pleasure was almost too much for him. And then Joshua hit _that_ spot, and he was all but mewling, his heart feeling like it was about to burst. His cock throbbed, and Joshua, seeming to read his mind, lifted his hand and began stroking him. He smeared the tears of precum over the shaft, pumping in rhythm to his thrusts.

It wasn't long before Neku could feel the pressure building up inside of him. He started grinding his hips against the silverette urgently. Joshua took the hint and began to thrust more deeply, hitting Neku's sweet spot with each thrust. It wasn't long before Neku was moaning unabashedly, meeting every thrust enthusiastically, desperate for his release. He knew Joshua was nearing his end, too, because the Composer's thrusts became faster and sloppier.

"Cum for me," Joshua whispered in his ear. That was all it took for Neku to come unhinged, his seed spurting out onto Joshua's hand and their stomachs. He heard Joshua give a throaty moan as he finished himself inside Neku, and Neku felt himself be filled with the sticky liquid.

Joshua slid out of Neku and collapsed on top of him, thoroughly spent. Neku felt the same. He waited until both of their breaths were even, and then he spoke. "That wasn't so bad."

Joshua looked up at him in amusement. "Oh really, now?"

Neku nodded, grinning playfully. "Yeah. But I think we could do better next time."

"Next time, hm?" Joshua murmured.

"There _is_ a next time, right?" Neku asked nervously. He held his breath.

Joshua sighed. "Is that really what you want?"

"Joshua, stop asking me that. Of course it's what I want, idiot," Neku said without any heat. "Why else would I sleep with you?"

"Because of my irresistible charms?" Joshua offered.

Neku rolled his eyes. "We need to get you off of your high horse. You're such an arrogant little prick."

"Why, I wouldn't say it's _little_."

"Ugh, did you really just say that?" Neku groaned. "I hate your stupid innuendos."

"Oh, but you really love me," Joshua said playfully. Neku felt the unspoken question in that statement.

"Yes," Neku answered. "I do."

"Good." Joshua smiled and kissed him. It was more of an innocent kiss, and Neku felt his heart warm at it. "Because you're not leaving my sight now."

"What?" Neku asked, confused.

"Didn't I tell you?" Joshua smirked. "You're my new Conductor."

"Huh? When the hell did _that_ happen?"

"Oh, well, I decided it before I got here. I was coming to tell you," A giggle, "But it seems I got…sidetracked."

"What? Then what the hell was all that shit about humans and Composers?" Neku growled.

"Oh, that was real. I was just giving you an out, dear," Joshua giggled, although Neku knew there was more to it than that, but he decided to let it slide. Just this once.

"Well, do I get any choice in the matter?" Neku asked, rubbing his forehead and trying not to strangle the man on top of him.

"Nope. Now, if you'll excuse me…" And then Joshua kissed him. This time it felt different. He felt a surge of energy rush into him, much like when he was using his pins, only a hundred times more powerful. Neku felt hot all over, like he was on fire. As soon as it hit him, the feeling had left, and he was left holding his head in his hands and groaning.

"What did you just do?!" Neku questioned angrily.

"Well, now you're my Conductor," Joshua answered patiently, like talking to a small child.

Neku gaped at him, his brain trying to catch up with the events that had happened. He remembered being sick, then he wasn't, then he was confessing to Joshua and eventually fucking him, and now this…His head was dizzy trying to comprehend the whirlwind of events. "Can't you ever do anything normal?"

"Normal is overrated, my dear Neku. Or should I say, my dear Conductor," Joshua giggled.

"Am I dead now?" Neku asked quietly.

Joshua sighed. "No, not technically. You're just in the RG right now, so that technically means that you alive." He brightened. "The death part comes later."

"WHAT?! What about my friends, what about my parents, what about my life-"

A giggle interrupted him. "Now now, Neku. I was only kidding. Yes, you can remain living. I'll just have to make an exception for you. Seeing as you're my lover and all." He winked.

Neku groaned. He felt a headache coming on. Neku realized what he should have a long time ago. Joshua was trouble. A sexy, attractive kind of trouble, but trouble nonetheless. But, he suspected, he had fallen for that kind of trouble, so he hoped it would be all right. After all, he _did_ trust his partner.

"Fine, whatever. Just as long as you don't leave."

"Wouldn't dream of it, dear~"

And then Joshua kissed him, and everything felt a little bit better.

OoO

"What are you saying?"

"I'm sorry, but I can't come over, Joshua. Shiki and I need to get this project done."

"But I nursed you back to health! You should at least return the favor!" came the voice of the indignant Composer.

Neku sighed. "Sorry Josh, but I can't. Maybe next time."

"Fine. I don't need you. Have fun with your _friend_," Neku could hear the sneer in his voice.

"Love you, too, Josh. I gotta go. Bye," Neku said.

The last thing he heard before closing his phone were three sneezes, all in a row.

OoO

A/N: I know, it was a rushed end, but I tried to stop the madness! I'm aware that this is a weird plot, and that Joshua is kind of bipolar. …Well, he kind of IS normally, I guess. But still. It's a bit rusty, and it was done in a day. I just had to get it out, you know? Constructive criticism is always appreciated.


End file.
